way to be original.

By saying you're starting over new.
By saying that you're going to change for the better.
By saying that you're going to spend more time with God.
By saying that you're going to get things done that need to be done.
By saying that you're going to finish what you started.
By saying that you're you're going to love more and fight less.
By saying that you'll respect more people and honor your values.
By saying everything will be different.
.....and then having nothing at all on that list change.
not one thing, at least not for the better.



Yeah, I need to stick to it.
Not just say it and not do it. I need to get back to where I was in my life a little over a year ago. I'm still not some wild child, but I am not at all satisfied with where I am in life. I need to go to Him and Him alone for He is the only one that can truly save me from this mess. I'm trying to fix too much all at one time, when what I truly need to do is go to God, give it to Him, and let Him take care of it. I need to put full trust in the God that was able to part water, walk on water, and turn water into blood. This God is just as powerful now as He was as we read about in the Bible. There is no reason that if I give it all up to Him, that He won't take care of me. I know this, I just have to live it. I have to stop being selfish because I'm obviously not getting myself anywhere. I love God, I sure am awful at showing it sometimes. I don't give Him enough time out of my day. I know I should do more for Him, and yet I don't. I need to not doubt Him at all and I need to fully trust in Him. Life is so much better on the other side. The side of the light. I need to run into this marvelous light and never wander into darkness again.

I'm sorry, Lord.
I love you.